REAL CONVERSATION:

hello Mike

hello kc my usual please

you got it hon vodka tonic with a lime, shall i tab Mike?
sure why not.


two hours later
one for the road kc, please...style="font-weight:bold;">ok mike heres the deal, you know my rules right..? how about this drink is on the house..only if....you let me call you a cab for a safe ride home.?
i don't need a damn cab, just get my drink i get out here then..
mike? this will be your fifth vodka tonic, how about i serve you a cup of coffee with a snack first..would that be okay?style="font-style:italic;">no! can i just have my damn drink please with out all this discussion?
mike, listen to me for a minute..your a regular customer here..we love your business-now what kind of a appreciative bartender would I be- to allow you to leave here driving-perhaps get a dui or even worse-an accident hurting you or even worse still-you kill someone a family or children..if not for yourself think of all those people just trying to get to where they are going to finally go home to a mother father brother sister or kids..and here you coome along only thinking about yourself and take their live into your hands and destroy them..is that what you want mike..ill get your drink now and your cab should be here in 30,,will that be okay mike

pause
yes yes yes enough already your killing my buzz..go ahead call me a cab whatever it takes to get a damn drink in this place...
you got it mike..

following day

hey kc, can you come here a minute
sure mike what can i do for ya
hey im sorry if i was a jerk yesterday, and i just want to thank you for what you did, i dont know how i would of made the drive home..i was pretty buzzed. I appreciate that thats why i come here cause I know I am in good hands with you behind the bar
no problem mike no worries...thats what I am here for